Look At What I'm Looking At

Devin Kelly

There are bigger fish to fry     It’s a blue-sky day      The air has stolen violent      the sun’s azure light      & scattered it around      It’s the ruin      of a bloodless war      Put that in your Instagram      I get sad so often      thinking how brilliant      the sun could be      if not deprived of all its color      Instead we marvel      the bold slant       metal’s shadow provides      on brick       the strut of bird’s beaked yellow      parading affront the sky      It’s the city baby      You could stay here forever      & be tired of how tired you are      for a very long time      Talk about it over coffee      with someone you call your friend      hug them with lips so close      to the hair that skirts their shoulder     you can taste how the sun      has bleached them      It’s a violent thing      to be alive      Your skin floats away      & is called dust       Someone breathes you in      & chokes      Someone else takes a photo of you       hanging twirling      in a spear of light      ripping through a window      & landing on the hardwood’s ballet floor       My friend texts me       to say he didn’t invite my ex       to a party I won’t attend       This is what the world is now       a series of little miracles        everyone thinks they’re performing       when I don’t really want them       Do you see this word       & how it can be       anything you want       if you say it long enough      Do you see how        a cello’s note hangs        even after its action        It’s like we could be ghosts      It’s like the word for violence        might as well be sky      It’s like some days       I want to be invisible       with the one I love       in a car on a bridge       in that space where the bridge       is not yet a bridge       Someone is working on it      always       That’s why the car       floats       That’s why when you wake up      from a bad dream       & reach to touch my arm       it’s my arm        & not someone else’s